Discipleship is deeply relational. It’s not just about what you know but about the person guiding you on your spiritual journey and those you are guiding. Throughout the Bible, we see powerful examples of this dynamic—mentors (disciplers) who invest in their mentees (disciples), passing on both wisdom and responsibility for the future of the faith.
In this post, we will explore the roles of the discipler and the disciple (mentee), why relationships are central to discipleship, and how these roles can guide us in our walk with Christ.
The Discipler: A Guide on the Journey
The discipler is a mentor who is further along in their walk with Christ and can help guide others in their spiritual journey. But being a discipler isn’t just about giving advice or teaching lessons—it’s about sharing life and modeling what it looks like to follow Jesus.
A fundamental example of this in Scripture is the Apostle Paul’s relationship with Timothy. Paul didn’t just teach Timothy about the faith; he walked with him, shared his experiences, and encouraged him to take on early church leadership. In 2 Timothy 2:2, Paul writes, “The things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.” Paul’s goal was not just to disciple Timothy but to equip him to pass on that wisdom to others.
As disciplers, we are called to:
- Model Christlikeness: Our actions should reflect the character and teachings of Christ. Discipleship is not just about sharing knowledge; it’s about living out what you believe so that others can see and follow.
- Provide Encouragement and Accountability: A discipler supports their mentee in spiritual growth, holding them accountable while encouraging them through challenges and setbacks.
- Equip and Empower: Discipleship is not just about learning—it’s about growth. A discipler equips their mentee to grow spiritually and empowers them to disciple others, continuing the cycle of spiritual multiplication.
The Mentee: A Willing Learner
The role of the mentee (disciple) is to engage actively in the process of growth and learning. While the discipler provides guidance, the mentee must be open and willing to learn, apply what they’ve learned, and share their journey with their mentor.
Timothy provides a model for this kind of receptiveness. He learned from Paul and actively applied that learning by leading churches and teaching others. He was open to correction, advice, and encouragement and grew into a spiritual leader because of his teachable spirit.
As mentees, we are called to:
- Be Teachable: Discipleship requires humility and a desire to grow. A good disciple is open to learning, even when uncomfortable or challenging.
- Apply What Is Learned: Knowledge alone is not enough. A true disciple takes what they have learned and puts it into action in their own life.
- Commit to Growth: Discipleship is a lifelong journey, not a one-time event. A mentee must be committed to continual spiritual growth and willing to be transformed by God’s Word and Spirit.
The Importance of Relationships in Discipleship
Discipleship is deeply relational. Jesus didn’t just teach His disciples from a distance—He walked with them, shared meals with them, and invited them into His life. The same is true for us today. Discipleship happens best in the context of relationships where there is trust, vulnerability, and shared life experiences.
In the relationship between a discipler and a mentee, there is an exchange of life—stories, struggles, victories, and lessons. This relational connection fosters more profound spiritual growth and creates a space for the discipler and the disciple to learn and grow together.
Modern discipleship might look like one-on-one meetings, phone calls, or even small groups, but the foundation remains the same: intentional relationships built on trust and a mutual desire to grow in Christ.
Practical Ways to Build a Discipling Relationship
Whether you are a discipler or a mentee, here are some practical steps for fostering a robust discipling relationship:
- Make Time for Regular Connection: Discipleship isn’t a one-time conversation; it’s an ongoing relationship. Set aside time to meet, talk, and pray together regularly.
- Be Open and Vulnerable: The discipler and the disciple need to create a safe space, to be honest about struggles, questions, and doubts. Discipleship flourishes in an atmosphere of trust.
- Set Goals for Growth: Whether spiritual, relational, or practical, setting goals helps focus your discipleship journey. What areas of your life are you seeking to grow in, and how can your discipler or mentee help you in that journey?
- Pray Together: Prayer is central to discipleship. Make a habit of praying for and with each other. It strengthens the bond between discipler and disciple and invites God’s presence into the relationship.
Conclusion: Relationships Matter in Discipleship
Discipleship isn’t just about teaching—it’s about transformation, which happens in the context of relationships through the power and dependence of the Holy Spirit. As disciplers, we are called to model Christ and help guide others on their journey. As disciples, we are called to be teachable, willing to grow, and committed to living out our faith.
Whether you’re discipling someone or being discipled, remember that the key to growth is found in relationships. Discipleship isn’t a solo journey—it’s a shared one. Who are you walking alongside in your discipleship journey today?
What’s in This Series?
Thank you for joining us in our six-part series on discipleship! We’ll continue to explore different aspects of what it means to follow Jesus and live as His disciple. Here is what is in this series:
What Does It Mean to Be a Disciple of Christ? Part 1 addresses the question we need to ask ourselves is: Are we just attending church, or are we actively being transformed as followers of Jesus?
Disciple or Follower: Is There a Difference? In Part 2, we’ll dive deeper into the distinctions between being a follower of Jesus and a true disciple. What does it mean to fully commit to Christ’s teachings, and how can we move from passive belief to active transformation?
Biblical Models of Discipleship: Lessons from the Old and New Testament. In Part 3, we’ll look at how discipleship has been modeled throughout the Bible, from Moses and Joshua to Paul and Timothy, and what we can learn from their relationships today.
The Role of the Discipler and Mentee: Why Relationships Matter in Discipleship Relationships are central to spiritual growth. In Part 4, we’ll explore the vital role that mentor-mentee relationships play in the process of discipleship.
Why One-on-One Discipleship Still Matters Today. As churches grow larger and small groups become more common, is one-on-one discipleship still relevant? In Part 5, we’ll make the case for returning to this biblical model for deeper spiritual growth.
Measuring Discipleship: How Do We Know We’re Making Progress? Finally, in Part 6, we’ll discuss how to measure the effectiveness of discipleship—both in our own lives and in the lives of those we disciple. What are the true indicators of spiritual growth?
Stay tuned as we continue this journey of rediscovering what it means to live as faithful disciples of Christ!
